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Win double tickets to the Winning Relationships Event!

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Why couples should be celebrating Valentine’s Day at least once a week

It’s February…cue red hearts, roses and all the anxiety that goes with meeting your lover’s high expectations.

But are these the crucial ingredients of a fulfilling relationship? Not according to Brian Walsh from REAL Success and keynote speakers Justin Cohen and Robin Banks.

For Walsh, before you can talk about having a healthy intimate relationship you need to live a life that is a reflection of your true values, not the ones imposed by society. “For a relationship to thrive, you do not need to have exactly the same values, but you do need to be supportive and respectful of each other’s values”, says Walsh.

Trying to impose your personal values on your partner is a quick road to disaster, while respect for each other will help you over the bumpiest patches, though none of this can be achieved by buying expensive gifts one day a year, he adds.

Banks is also not a fan of the trappings of commercial romance, and believes that hard work is needed to keep a relationship afloat, especially after the initial love hormones have faded, which can last for anything from two months to two years. “During this heady stage we are in love with our projection of ‘the perfect partner’”, he says.

Cohen says it is easy to dismiss the commercialised version of Valentine’s Day but anything that encourages people to take the time to write love notes and go on date nights should be applauded. The issue is that one day a year is not nearly enough to keep love alive, though a weekly Valentine’s Day might be just the thing. He says that in good relationships the partners continue to do the little things they did during the giddy early days of the relationship, making them into habits that make each other feel valued and supported.

The one habit that can keep love alive is showing our appreciation for each other, every day. “We never get bored of being appreciated. You can never say thank you enough,” says Cohen.

You can send a daily WhatsApp telling your partner how much you appreciate them, for example, he says.

If all of this sounds like hard work, it is because that is what it takes to make love last. Banks says that an indication that you have found a good match is if you are willing to put in the hours it will take to keep the relationship warm and rewarding.

“Being conscious and aware of what is required to keep your relationship on track can help you avoid another pitfall that many relationships fall into — growing apart”, Banks says. We all change as we get older, no-one is the same person at 40 that they were at 20, but the secret is to try to do your growing together so the relationship benefits from your shared experiences.

Win double tickets to the Winning Relationships Event from 29 February – 1 March, worth R9 994! Entries close Friday 21 February at 8am.

To find out more about how to have a warm, fulfilling relationship, join Cohen at the Winning Relationships event on February 29 and March 1 at the Bryanston Country Club. The event will also be broadcast live. Click here to buy your tickets.

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Pictures are only a representation. By signing up for this competition, you agree to receive the Living and Loving weekly newsletter. The winner will be chosen randomly from the entries of individuals that submitted their details on the competition form. Entries open to Gauteng residents only. The prize does not include travelling costs or accommodation. Competitions are not open to employees of CTP Caxton, sponsors, their immediate families and agencies. The promoter’s decision is final, and no correspondence will be entered into. We reserve the right to forward contact details of entrants to competition sponsors. Prizes are not transferrable and can’t be exchanged for cash. There are no costs associated with redeeming prizes. Winner will be notified by telephone, email or post. All prize values are correct at time of publication. Prizes awarded are the responsibility of the competition sponsors. Winners must be willing to be photographed for possible publication in Living and Loving free of any fee. Caxton Magazines, its employees, directors, representatives or agents will not be liable for any loss or damages incurred, and Caxton Magazines shall not be liable for any loss of whatsoever nature and however arising. Prizes are valid for one year from date of issue they appear in and cannot be re-issued should they expire or re-sent if they are returned.

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